Bio

Sally performs twice a week at the Comedy Store in Los Angeles and entertains worldwide for the U.S. troops. She is the Winner of Funniest Comic in LA 2015 and has been seen on MTV, Playboy TV and national commercials. She has extensive hosting experience and performs for corporations including IBM and check out her #GetLiveMonday open mic at the Pig N’ Whistle on Hollywood Boulevard. After wrapping her 2 year run of Hello Cougar with Dromebox.com, she is in production with Cookin’4 Pussy, soon to be on You Tube.

For bookings contact Sweetgigs818@gmail.com

WINNER OF FUNNIEST COMIC IN LA, 2015

Feed the Pussy


I love the art by Josh Fong. It’s so Valley

Guys don’t want to date me right now and I don’t blame them. I have not had even one coffee date this whole year which means it’s time to start doing freaky shit. Many supporters of Hello Cougar ask when it’s coming back. As of right now there are no plans to continue with it because Dromebox.com is now a full-time rental studio for TV and film projects and Craigslist has discontinued Casual Encounters so they do not get accused of Traffiking. The government can take away Casual Encounters but they cannot take away my memories. 36 men of Craigslist were a big part of Hello Cougar and our last show was in December of 2017, so it’s time.
Cookin’4 Pussy will be a PG-13 show (as long as that 13-year-old has had a really hard life) where guys with both amateur and professional culinary skills (preferably with a leaning toward humane farming practices) can submit video saying what meal you’d like to cook me (my place or yours, preferably yours) and I decide who I want to enjoy an evening of dinner and sex with. I am not filming any sex or nudity as this will be on my YOU TUBE. It will have dirty talk interviews in the spirit of Hello Cougar but it will basically be a cooking show where you get to show off your kitchen skills on camera and then your bedroom skills for me. In an effort to be less exploitive I will not use your pitch video if you are not picked for the project but please be between 21 and 50 and send a one to three minute video telling and or showing me what you would like to cook me and whatever else you want me to know to Cookin4Pussie@gmail.com. That “ie” on pussy is not me being girly, it’s just what Gmail allowed me to have and they run us, so…
Any questions hit me up at that email as well. Please really know how to cook, no making me order thru a Clown’s Mouth. This is a cooking show with a dash of sex. My only dietary restriction is dairy.

Email once again: Cookin4Pussie@gmail.com

Stepmom Knows Best


I’ve always had pussy drama.

Most women today have a vagina and some of them can be very sensitive. I can remember being a little girl and complaining to my mom about my pussy hurting and she did the best she could with assorted creams and home remedies in the 1970’s. I’m so glad I’m a big girl now and can google stuff. Here is how I deal with a touchy twat that I have known for almost 50 years.

1. Baby Wipes – What do you call a chick buying baby wipes but she has no babies? A slut… or maybe just the owner of a sensitive vagina. One of my porn star pals turned me onto wipes about a decade ago as they helped her keep that area calm on set. I go thru about 70 wipes a week. Definitely pick an unscented hypoallergenic brand like Seventh Generation or Honest Wipes or if you’re strapped for cash try Food 4 Less. It has a great selection of feminine protection including fragrance free. These can really help prevent a yeast infection, but if it goes there, Food4Less has generic creams and suppositories for that, too. Sometimes they have to use the key to take the good good out of the cabinet, but who cares. You’re in Food4Less. You’re shameless.
Always use a wipe or two after intercourse and be a sweetheart and dab his dick down, even let him have his own wipe, even an expensive brand.

2. Threelac – In my early 30’s yeast infections started being a big part of my life. My PH was off and any amount of moisture, tight jeans, sex, all the good stuff seemed to be sending me to the drugstore or the gyno to get the Diflucan pill. Quite a few co-pays in I found out about a chill powder that dissolves in your mouth a few times a day and helps restore your balance with its blend of probiotics. I had good experiences dealing with Mike Winnicki who is a distrubutor and gets your order out pronto. I am not even getting a pimping cut, that is how much I believe in this product (hint, Mike) Anyway, the powder has a low-key refreshing taste and Mike’s customer service is refreshing.

3. Pantyliners – when I started running about 5 years ago it was hell on my vag. It seemed the toned bod I was developing on the track always itched in the middle. I was running with this virgin in her early 20’s who had been taught culturally to keep herself extremely clean. When I was bitching about the risk of sweaty yoga pants she suggested a pantyliner when I ran. pretty soon I was wearing them 24/7. One word: UNSCENTED and I wonder if she’s still a virgin.

4. Folic Acid and B12 – Bacterial Vaginosis may not itch and burn like a yeast infection but it has a foul odor and according to a nurse I met at Kaiser who looked like a 70’s horror movie nurse (in a good way) yeast infections are an acid imbalance and BV is from alkaline issues. I would get BV from either using soap containing Sodium Laureth Sulfate (most soaps) or cum. I was having to go to Kaiser and go thru STD tests to be sure and then take Flagyl which worked right away on the BV, but you can’t drink with it so it helps your alcoholism as well, After several visits for this pussy drama, I googled that a Folic Acid B-12 combo can help regulate this problem so you can skip the Flagyl and keep partying. I was under 40 so I did. Now I avoid BV by not letting guys cum in me and I suggest you do the same. It’s overrated.

Now that momma has shared her seasoned advice for the ladies, let’s not leave the boys out. I have heard from several of my cubs that they found respectful casual sex situations off sites like Adult Friend Finder. Both guys and girls pay so it eliminates the spam and cam and you meet people serious about casual. Of course as a guy you have to put in the time but from my experience on there, younger men make connections, and if you read this entire article, you will have a much better understanding of vaginas and a leg up on the competition. Yes, I do get a cut of this even if you just click and check it out! No risk but if you pay to join and hook up, practice safety and kindness!
Click Here

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Hey Summer…You Whore!

The Boyz of Summer Comedy Special has arrived (notice that is Boyz with a “z.” I don’t want to piss off Don Henley) It features cubs from Hello Cougar, Comedian Maddie Hanson, me dancing with a werewolf and then receiving oral from said werewolf, and several different swimsuits, both one piece and bikini. I open the special in my very own “Haunted Speedo.” This is an odd piece of swimwear that truly belongs to me in that even smaller girls can’t get it on. This was an expensive item for me at about $50 retails but that’s the price you pay for monogamy. The rest of my suits are from Ebay or Tarjay. Enjoy, thru up a comment, subscribe, post it, spank to it. The special contains no nudity but I age restricted it on You Tube for mature content that is extremely silly, and of course check out Hello Cougar Saturdays at Dromebox 11pm PT, like tonight for example.

Both babes tweet @SusanSaiger and @Jennifer Valley

Drome and I are currently developing a retro dating show but we have been running Girls Drink Free for almost two years. I have had chance to work with over 150 talented women and a few shitty ones. Two of my favorites and new friends are these troublemakers, Jennifer Vally and Susan Saiger. I have known Jen for years as she was this hot babe when I got into comedy and she seemed to stop aging then and there (half-Asian bitch) and when she turned up with her buddy Susan Saiger I felt like I’d known Susan for years..truth was I kind of had. Susan starred in what is pretty much my favorite movie ever, 1989’s Scenes From The Class Struggle in Beverly Hills. I paid to see it twice at the theatre and you know how cheap I am. She was actually in several Paul Bartel flicks and is a classically trained actress who also does kick-ass stand up in LA and Vegas and look for her and Jen on the Cool Moms Comedy Tour. I must she she was really cool about me going into fan-girl mode quoting lines from Class Struggle. You guys are invited to have me in your face for the next two Thursdays 9pm PT for Girls Drink Free at Drome.

The Cool Moms hit the road

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